A open letter to my friends, lovers, admirers, and acquaintances.
I often thought about when this chapter of my life would end. I wondered when it would happen, what circumstances would lead me to the decision to end my time as a //// I also consider how I would do it- would I disappear, would I go on a farewell tour, would I let all my favorites see me one more time? Although I didn't have a end game, I have always told myself I would quit when it was no longer fun. I assumed I would most likely stop, because I had found love and wanted to settle down with Mr. Wonderful. I had no end goal. I loved being a ///// and having a series of lovers who adored me, and treated me well. But, I've began to feel a void. a HUGE void. You see, for me, being a sex worker, was very isolating. it's a gradual thing: you don't notice it until one day it hits you. It now feels, that this lifestyle is hindering my personal growth. A few close friends know both sides of being a ///// , but, for the most part this side of me, has been kept hidden. I avoided new people, friends, and relationships. I have become a hermit, and a fraction, of the person I once was.
Being a //// was a way for me to date, to have no strings attached fun. Traditional dating was often exhausting, unrewarding, and sometimes painful for me. I was tired of feeling like a sex object, but as a escort, it leveled the exchange. The thrill of my ///// dates were intoxicating and exciting. So much more than a regular date. I have had a great run, I have met incredible friends, had wonderful experiences and created memories to last a LIFETIME. But, its just time, it's no longer me; I'm a genuine person, and have always valued the connections I made with clients and lovers. It meant more to me than the roses. If my head isn't in it anymore. No amount of roses in this world can make it worth it. I can not dedicate myself fully to the things that matter, my family, my career, and things dear to my heart, because being a //// is much more time consuming than most think. While being //// has been fun, it has ALWAYS left me with an empty feeling. I tried VERY hard to find a balance, not to go down a rabbit hole where I lost touch with reality. But, the truth is, this has changed me. I've learned a lot about people - more than in any other job I've ever had. I've learned more about myself, I have grown tremendously as a person; even when hiding myself. However, it's just time. It's time to say goodbye. Although, this goodbye is bittersweet for me, it's the best thing for me, my family, my career, and my future.
Whether you have been a friend, lover, supporter, admirer, acquaintances, I thank you for your support. You will never know how much I appreciate all you've done for me.
Starting July, I will be deleting this site, deleting all my //// advertisements, and ending my time as a ////. I will still be available, throughout July, but will be removing things starting July. After my deletion is completed, so will my journey in ////